LIVING
ORGAN DONOR SHAKES KIDNEY TREE
Dear friends,
This holiday season, why not consider giving
the gift of an internal organ?
My name is Vermin Supreme, and I am a
living kidney donor using my elevated moral position to make this urgent
appeal.
Right now, some 70,000 Americans are
in need of a kidney, and my dear friend Virgil Fowler is one of them.
Through no fault of his own, he finds himself in end
stage renal failure.
VERMIN SUPREME WANTS TO
GUILT TRIP YOU
When my friend Luke Clemente's kidneys were failing,
a few years back, I jokingly offered to trade one of my kidneys for one
of his testicles. Unfortunately for him, I had already committed to giving
one of mine, (kidney) to my mother, who was also entering end stage kidney
failure. He died, but my mother lived. I dedicated my kidney donation
to him.
FACT : YOU HAVE ONE MORE KIDNEY THAN YOU REALLY NEED !
It costs
nothing to screen to be a potential kidney (or marrow or liver)
donor. In fact, it's a great way to get a free medical checkup !
( I got a free colonoscopy as part of my screening.)
It starts
with a simple blood test . They put both your antibodies in a little
test tube wrestling ring. If the anti-bodies fight too much ...maybe
you're not a good
match. But, if they don't fight. BINGO. You could be a donor. It's fast.
It's fun. It's easy.
Of course , there is a long series of screening
tests ,beyond that ,to assure compatibility. Anywhere along the way ,
even if promising , you could be rejected, for any number
of reasons.
FACT : A DONOR WILL REGAIN 90% OF THEIR ORIGINAL KIDNEY
CAPACITY. (i.e. you can still
drink.)
NO WORRIES: They
will not take your organs from you unless you are extremely
healthy. At any time during the process, you can opt out and change
your mind. No
questions asked. (The recipient will be told you were not an acceptable
match.)
FACT: EVEN IF NOT COMPATIBLE WITH VIRGIL,
YOU COULD STILL SAVE A LIFE. If you do donate to a needy stranger on
the list, whom you do match, Virgil will be bumped up the list.
FACT: RECOVERY TIME WAS PRETTY DAMN
QUICK. The operation is laprascopic. A couple day post-op stay in the
hospital. After two weeks, I was back on the playground, wrangling
rugrats. At three weeks, I was riding a Stegosaurus for the movie Vote
Jesus.
DONATING ORGANS
AFTER YOU'RE DEAD IS NICE, BUT WHY NOT GO FOR THE GUSTO AND DONATE YOUR
ORGANS WHILE YOU ARE STILL ALIVE . ...NOW THAT'S EXTREME !!!
If interested call the VIRGIL KIDNEY DRIVE
HOT LINE 1-207-461-0442 or e-mail Deandre at : virguall (at) aol.com
We are stardust we are carbon, we are bio
bags of organs. |